Fantasy High
by angstie-lightning
Summary: dang highschool SUCKS. but the final fantasy XIII cast already know that since theyve been goin to a all grade boarding shool since pre K. bullys friends relation ships all merge together. while this is a XIII KH crossover KH isint the only cross or 1st
1. Beginning of School Days

[prolauge] backround information

lightning- grade 10

snow-grade 10

hope-8

serah-9

sazh-10

fang-10

noel-9

vanille-8

Chapter 1 : Soft thunder

-Serah-

I looked through my closet for something to wear on the first day back to school. "You've got to be kidding me." I answered. "I have NOTHING to wear!"

I continued to look, but then I realized something."aww man! i forgot to wake up lighting" rushing towards my older sisters room. i opened the door turned on the lights and said"comon lighting its time to wake up! todays the first day back to school!""ughhh" lightning sighed"do i have to?" "of course! now get a shower eat some toast have a glass potion and then we can leave" blegh...but...""NO!" i shut the the door and walked back to my room so i could continue my serch for somthing decent to wear.

as we boraded the train i caught glimpes of the most beautiful thing i had ever seen. Noel.

Chapter 2. Shotgun Shell Filled Snow

-lighting-

my least favourite part of the year was aprroching ever faster. Oreientation. i hate the first day of a new school year seeing the people that ruin my life on a daily bussiness. the annoying flirty guys. the bitchy drama kids. and the sluty cheerleaders allways trying to draft

into a shitty click. but the worst of all was always ...snow...and i dont mean the weather eaither. snow had always been a bodybuilding arrogent prick and he was the worst of the guys who liked me. he always thought he was so tough and awesome. but if he were in a fight with me his scrawyney little ass would be red as a pallete changed goblin. across the room i spotted my only friend. hope an 8th grader. we exchanged a friendly wave. i met hope when i was in 4th grade he was getting hisface pounded in by snow...of all people...the dick

i beat the fucking shit out of snow. i wasent gonna let someone as lonely as me be pushed around by someone who compensates for a small penis with large musculer capacity. we were getting assigned to homerooms when i saw someone who looked famileir but mysterous at the same time. it was the black guy sazh. his family supposidly ran a chocobo farm. and all i could say was " what the fuck?" as i saw snow pick him up by is scrappy afro and chuck him into the trash. " whats wrong with your hair you dirty hobnocker. stop fucking chocobos you sick pervert." snow taunted. it was at that moment i snaped and i tackled him to the ground hoping i wasent going to be known as the school slut by tomarow afternoon and and punched and kicked and bit and kneed and did anything i could to beat the arrogence out of this shitty blond racist small wanged ass hole getting as close as i could to killing him witbout ripping his fucking balls of and stapaling then to his forhead forcing him to give him self a blow job. my fists heart like shit and i knew my chances of sucseeding in the boxingclub tryouts had just been signifagently lowerd. but i didint care i was done and i was gonna make this bitch put a dick in his mouth and shut the fuck up. at that moment i suddenly relized i had another friend.

Chapter 3 : People named after icecream falvours

-Hope-

i had never known if i would ever see the meaning of life. a huge brawl was going on between snow and light and light was kicking ,pardon my french, kicking snows ass

but the whole time all i could think about was that girl across the room

she was new and she was hot.

and luckly i landed my happy ass in her homeroom class. in the middle of home economics [ we were learning how to make hi potions] i wrote her a not asking who she was

she replied with. "nice to meet you im vannile". suddenly out loud i said "you mean like the icecream falvour" she said " are you retarded" i subconcoiusly said " at least i have a soul" which earned me a slap to the face and a bullet to the self esteem. as i rubbed my cheek i said "nice to meet you my names hope" "you mean like the emotion?" " are you retarded"

" i least i know what pubety is" and beleive it or not that was the start of a friendship

Chapter 4 : Pink Hair's Only Hot On Lightning

-Serah-

I was in my first class, which was WA: Weapon Alchemy.

I was sitting by Noel, the gorgeous man I saw on the train. God, he was just so HOT.

"Hi. I'm Serah." I whispered nervously.

"Oh. I'm Noel. Nice to meet you." He said with a sarcastic tone in his voice. I could have sworn he just called me a loser under his breath. I wanted to punch him in the...well, you know, reproductive organs, but he was too gorgeous to harm.

"Excuse me?" I asked. "Did you just say something?"

"Sorry, but pink hair only looks good on that hot chick, Lightning."

"EXCUSE ME?" I semi-yelled like a stereotypical black girl, complete with the stereotypical head-sway. " Well BTW lightings my sister asshole" "so? your ugly as a retarded chocobo whos mother was on crack during pregneancy so i dont give a fuck" and then i well...you know lowerd his chance of being a father

Chapter 5: when your bit by a fang

-Fang-

Some kid named Hope, Vanille, and myself were walking towards the dormatories, mainly because we wanted to find out the dorm arrangements.

"I wonder who I'll be paired up with." Hope commented as we were getting closer to the dorms. To be honest, I didn't give a rat's ass on who he got paired up with. Right now, I couldn't care less about this random.

"I sure hope I get paired up with someone nice." Vanille said. "Either that, or someone I don't know."

"Why is that?" I asked. "That person could be a a complete jerk or an ass hole."

"But it gives me an opportunity to make a new friend." Vanille answered back. I just got served.

"Good point." I said. "Good point, indeed."

We eventually made it to the dorms, where the room listings. I looked for my name first, and I found out that the dorms were co-ed, and then I realized that I was paired up with TWO GUYS: Sazh, and some nobody named Damien.

"Great," I began. "I, Fang, seem to have the only dorm room with two members of the opposite sex.

"You might want to go down to the drug store to buy some condoms." Hope joked. "One in the vag, the other up the ass."

"Imma gonna kill you!" I threatened.

"He was just kidding, Fang," Vanille said. "Don't over-react. And I bet you're not the only one with two people of the opposite gender bunking with you."

I sighed. "I guess you're right. By the way, who are you guys bunking with?"

"We're paired up with each other." Vanille answered, motioning to Hope, who was facing the other way, for an unknown reason.

Suddenly, Sazh appeared and joined our little conversation. "I hear you and I are bunking together." He said to me.

"Yup." I responded. "Along with some other guy that we should probably try to find."

"That...would be a smart idea." Sazh and I left the group, saying good-bye to Hope and Vanille, who actually made a pretty cute couple.

Chapter 6: first comes lighting then comes thunder

-lightning-

when i was 7 our parents got divorced leaving me and sarah with dad and thunder with mom.

thunder and i were twins and vary close at that. he was a better father then dad ever was but our relationship wasent that of a father daughter sort. when i looked at the assingment board i was supriesed to even see my brothers name. thunder farron. it had been so long since we had last spoke virutualy or psycly. and i was excited to see him as my room mate. unforututitly small cocky snow was my other partner and that was not good. i dont even no if bunkig with my brother was worth it as snow showed up at the dorm with a box of...condoms . its not like they would fit or he would fit in me or i would LET HIM!

but as soon as i saw the comforting eyes of my older by an hour twin brother i forgot all about that asshole. i tackled my brother with a hug and confused snow into thinking i had a boyfriend.

i know it wasent the best plan but i just went along with it...till he relized that it was my brother that moved away...god friggin damnit. " thunder were have you been the last fucking 9 years asshole" " just kidding your one of the only people i know who isint an asshole" i said motioning my eyeballs to snow whos testies were smaller then my nipples." i can see your still as vulger as the bible " he responded " that book has the record for most uses of the word ass" " is snow still an arrogent small cokced no testosterone 90 percent retarded sperm spewing masturbating to your book of meny faces profile pic?" he asked "yes" i answerd . smriking at snow devilioshly as i noticed he seemed offended. " so " asked thunder" weres your boyfriend" "FUCK YOU!" i said

Chapter 7: Is Your Pubic Hair Pink?

-Serah-

When I walked into my room, I nearly threw up, for the carzy-hot but complete douche Noel was lazily on the bed he claimed.

"Are you kidding me?" I shouted. "Of all people, I get stuck with you?"

"Looks like it, hun." He said back, almost suggestively. "By the way, can you tell me a little about your sister, Lightning?"

"Well," I began. "she's not into complete douchebags like you. Or Snow, for that matter. She also wants a guy who doesn't treat her little sister like you do, ass face."

"Harsh." Noel said. "That was NOT cool."

"Well, it's the truth, so live with it. Long story short, there is a more likely chance that Lightning would hook up with a CHICK than you, even if you were the last guy on the planet that still produces sperm."

"Can I at least ask a few questions?"

"Fine." I answered back, regretting I ever said anything.

"One: what kind of movies does she like? Two: what kind of music does she listen to? Three: what's her weapon type?"

"Horror movies where the people get killed in the most gruesome ways. Classical stuff, like all that orchestra shit. Gun blade."

"Okay," Noel smirked. "what's her bra size, and does she have pink pubic hair?"

I immediately left the room without saying a single word.

Chapter 8: Horror Movies Where People Get Killed In The Most Gruesome Ways Possible

-Hope-

Vanille and I (score!) curled up in front of the TV, watching a very horrifying movie Lightning and I used to (and still do) watch.

"Why did I agree to watch this movie?" Vanille complained.

"Because I agreed to watch "The Chequebook" after "Wednesday The Seventh" was over." I reminded her.

"Well 'The Checkbook' is actually GOOD, unlike this piece of garbage."

"Fine." I said." How about we watch 'Forest Lump' or 'Stony Borbara' instead?"

"Well," Vanille began. "I've seen those movies WAY too many times. Can't we just talk about our feelings? For example, who do you like?"

"Well...well...well..." I panicked. "I have to pee." Leaving the conversation, I ran to the bathroom and shut the door behind me.

"God, I'm stupid." I said to myself. "Stupid, stupid, STUPID! I'm almost as stupid as Seth Settler in the 'Seth Settler Vs. The Globe.'"

I exited the bathroom, and rejoined Vanille. "Are you alright?" She asked. "Do you need a potion or something?"

"No, I'll be okay. I just need to tell you something."

"Go ahead. You can tell me anything."

"Well, I sort of...I think I have...well, to be honest, I...have a bit of a crush on you." I felt my face getting warmer, and I could tell that I was blushing.

"That's...um, really sweet of you, and...well, I think that I like you, too." YYYEEESSSSSSSSS!

Chapter 9: Wow, I'm A Douche

-Noel-

I was sitting in math, next to Serah, and for some reason, I couldn't stop looking at her. After the incidents we had with each other, I JUST realized how beautiful she was.

"Wow, I'm a douche." I said out loud. Oh. My. God.

Serah looked at me. "And you just realized this now?"

"Yes, and I'm sorry. I souldn't have done those things to you, or treated you like the way I did."

"Too late, Noel." Wow. That was the first time she didn't call me anything like "ass face" or "dick head."

The bell rang, and everyone left the math room. Everyone, that is, except for Serah and myself.

"You coming?" I asked her.

"No," she answered. "I'm staying behind so the teacher can help me with something."

"It's DPS, isn't it?" I interrogated, preparing myself for a kick to the nuts and a slap to the face.

"Yes." Serah responded depressingly. "I can't seem to grasp the idea of it all. I'd ask Lightning, but she's busy with her job."

I sat down next to her. "Don't worry. I'm kind of an ace when it comes to DPS...and when it comes to something else naughty.

"...Ass." Serah commented. "You, sir, are an ass."

"I'm used to it by now. Anyways, so here how DPS works..."

Chapter 10: Nice To Meet You, Frocobo

-Sazh-

When Fang and I got to our room, our room mate, Daimen Whats-his-face, was already there, hanging up what looked like hand-drawn posters over what I guess was his bed.

"Hey." He greeted. "I'm Damien, and you two must be Sazh and Fang."

"Yep," Fang replied. "and I see that you've already moved in. Did you draw those posters yourself?"

"Yeah, I'm sort of an artist." Damien responded. "I also have a LOT of free time."

"Well I think they're pretty neat." I answered, walking up to an empty bed and putting down my stuff.

"Thanks." He replied.

"So," Fang began. "how long have ya been here?"

"Only a few minutes." Damien said. "I didn't start unpacking until basically you guys showed up."

_Well, _I thought. _Those two seem to be hitting it off._

Chapter 11: Die, Fucker!

-Lightning-

While Thunder was taking a nap, Snow and I were having another fight.

"As I told you time and time again," I began. "a gun blade is a more practical weapon than different kinds of gloves!"

"No!" Snow yelled back. "What if someone knocks your gun blade off of an edge or something, what do you do then?"

"If you're like me, you either have a tighter grip, or you fly down and go get it, dumbass!"

"Well, what if you don't have the ability to fly, ya bitch?" I'll admit it: he had a good point.

"Okay, you got me there, but what if you break your fingers or something?"

"You don't!" Snow screamed. God, I almost forgot that Thunder was such a sound sleeper.

"You guys," Thunder suddenly said. "need to shuddafuckup." He fell back down on his bed, asleep once again.

"You know what?" I began. "This conversation is over." I left the room, but before I did, I gave Snow a swift kick to the testicles.

Chapter 12: Awkward

-Vanille-

"Well, what do we do now?" I asked. "I mean, this is a little awkward."

"I know what you mean." Hope said. "I guess we could just keep this thing between us, and when we know we're ready to announce our 'love,' we will."

"Maybe you're right. We're only in the eighth grade, and we don't really wanna ruin anything, like our friendship."

"Exactly." Hope commented.

I kissed him. "There. Sealed like an envelope.

"Cute simile." Hope smiled. I just realized how perfect his teeth were.

Chapter 13:


	2. Cross over 1 digital slave drivers

Chapter 2

-Lightning-

So there we were, the 17 of us; Thunder, Damien, Fang, Sazh, Serah, Noel, Vanille, Hope, Snow, Tai, T.K., Matt, Sora, Mimi, Joe, Izzy, and myself, all wondering around in a dense forest.  
>"How long has it been since we started walking?" Serah complained.<br>"Three hours, 47 minutes, and twelve seconds." Damien said like a know-it-all.  
>"You would know that how?" Snow asked critically.<br>"...I have a watch." Damien snapped back. That dick just got burned.  
>While the rest of the group was talking amongst themselves, Thunder was trying to introduce me to some guy I didn't know.<br>"C'mon," He nagged. "I'll think you two could really hit it off."  
>"Who is he?" I questioned. "And is he physically attractive?"<br>"Well, his name is Tidus, and I'm not gay, so I can't really answer your other question."  
>I turned around to see what this "Tidus" guy looked like, and honestly, he was pretty hot.<br>"Hey." Tidus said. "So that's what the front of your face looks like."  
>"...When did you get here?" I asked. "And why are you here?"<br>"Well, Sin sent me here, and I was planning to get out of here as fast as possible." Tidus replied. "Now for my question. Do you wanna go out sometime?"  
>"...Well..." Then I thought that if I was with Tidus, Snow will be in emotional pain and be really jealous. He would also back off. "...Of course. When should our date be?"<br>"A.S.A.P." Tidus answered. Out of nowhere, a giant monster appeared. Fuck, I hate random encounters.  
>"Get ready, guys!" Snow yelled "By the way, dick face, I'm the leader. So you need to shut the hell up."<br>Snow glared back, giving me the finger at the same time.  
>The monster slashed in Vanille's general direction. She jumped out of the way, landing on Sazh's fro. Serah shot an arrow into the monster's knee. Insert "arrow to the knee" joke here.<br>Tai's dinosaur slave jumped to take a bite out of the monster's face.  
>Snow tried to punch the monster's face, but instead of actually causing the monster physically pain, he ran out of HP. "Anyone got a phoenix down?" Snow asked.<br>"What's a phoenix down?" Sora questioned. "It's a drug, fool!" Sazh said in a stereotypical black man's voice.  
>"Anyway..." I said as I aimed my gun blade at the monster's groin area. I fired a shot, and the monster instantly vanished.<br>"Typical." Serah commented. "A guy monster would die from a shot to the balls."  
>"Okay." The short kid Izzy began. "Take these cell phones I managed to make in the past 37 seconds. Put in this number, and you might return home."<br>"MIGHT?" Hope shouted. "Where will we end up if we don't return home?"  
>"The recycling bin, but there's only a 46.992876009% chance of that happening." "Okay." I said back. Each of the non-digital-monster-slave-drivers took one. We all put in the number in, and suddenly, there were all sorts of colours, and I found myself back in my dorm room, with everyone else on top of me, for some reason.<br>"What is this?" The dorm advisor yelled. "No epic orgies before 2 am! 


End file.
